Monday Brain

Brain: Good morning

Me: Huh?

Brain: Good morning sleepy head!

Me: What’s up and why are you so cheery?

Brain: It’s Monday!

Me: No shit and what’s good about that?

Brain: Everything is good about it!

Me: You’re weird.

Brain: I’ve been up for a while thinking

Me: Thinking about what?

Brain: Just stuff

Me: What kind of stuff?

Brain: You know, brain stuff

Me: Ah, I don’t know about brain stuff

Brain: Did you know that Albert Einstein once said, “Imagination is more important than knowledge. For knowledge is limited, whereas imagination embraces the entire world, stimulating progress, giving birth to evolution.”

Me: I think I read that once or twice

Brain: Based on that why haven’t you started stimulating progress and pooping out evolutionary stuff?

Me: What are you talking about?

Brain: Duh. Really?

Me: Seriously, I don’t know what your talking about

Brain: You are such an idiot, let’s go.

Me: I think we’re going to blow off the gym today

Brain: No way fat man.It’s a great Monday and we’re going to start the week right!

Me: Fine

Brain: Come on!

About 10 minutes into the eliptical…..

Brain: Hey Fat man?

Me: What?

Brain: If you’re not going to try let’s just stop.

Me: What? I’m trying.

Brain: No you’re not.

Me: Yes I am

Brain: Bullshit, you’re walking through this. Now find second gear and let’s go

Me: Fine

Brain: Come on Fat Man, if you’re going to do it, do it with purpose.

Me: FINE!!!

Brain: Now you’re rocking Fat Man. You know the Dalai Lama once said, “The purpose of our lives is to be happy.”

Me: Whatever, I bet the Dalai Lama is fast asleep right now.

Brain: Stop being such a douche, now go faster

Me: Fine

Brain: Good job- Endo, Tonin and Dope just showed up.

Me: Oh great.

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