Brain Spring

Brain: Happy Vernal Equinox

Me: Huh?

Brain: Weeee hoooo, it’s the Vernal Equinox!

Me: What? Dude it’s 345am.

Brain: Wake up lazy ass, it’s the first day of Spring!

Me: Uh, so what.

Brain: So what? Are you kidding me?

Me:  Uh, no.

Brain: At 12:15pm today it’s the Vernal Equinox.

Me: Sure

Brain:  Do you know equinox comes from the latin, “equal night.”

Me: Who cares?

Brain: I do Fat Man! Let’s welcome the sun back to the Northern Hemisphere!

Me: Oh, whoopee!

Brain: Do you know what role the Vernal Equinox plays in setting the date for Easter?

Me: No.

Brain: Easter is always the first Sunday after the first full moon on or after the Vernal Equinox.

Me: You are just a storehouse of useless knowledge

Brain: Don’t be a jerk. Don’t you find the Pagan influence on Christian calendar interesting?

Me: No

Brain: Do you know the German Goddess of Spring is called Eostre?

Me: Go away.

Brain: Eostre, Easter..hmmmm don’t you think that’s interesting? She liked Rabbits and eggs.

Me: So what?

Brain: So what? Did you know rabbits can get pregnant while they’re already pregnant

Me: You are just full of interesting shit.

Brain: Piss off. What are you bringing to the table this morning Fat Man?

Me: Ummmm, I’ll drive to the gym?

Brain: You bet your ass Fat Man. Let’s go.

Me:  Fine

Brain: On the way I can tell you about why yellow marshmallow rabbits and chocolate eggs are such a big part of Easter.

Me: I can’t wait.

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