Smoking Brain

Me: Hey Brain, that was great

Brain: Nice job oh Fattest of them all

Me: Come on, give me a break.

Brain: Just kidding Fatty Patty

Me: 3.55 miles in 35 minutes. That’s good for us

Brain: It’s not bad. Not bad at all

Me: Why do you have to be such a dick

Brain: Duh, I’m your Brain ass monkey

Me: So

Brain: You know, that store-house of sarcastic and sardonic wit.

Me: Oh yeah, a virtual store-house

Brain: It’s funny that I call it wit. Most people just call it asshole

Me: So very true

Brain: Yo me, thanks for releasing all the synaptic provocateurs this morning

Me: You’re welcome

Brain: Let’s get outta here

Me: Okay

Walking out of the gym I see the 5am woman pull into the parking spot next to us. She is always there by 5am. She usually gets on the treadmill. As she gets out of the car I look towards her to say hi and notice that she is smoking a cigarette. I say hi and give her the hand wave. She looks at me, takes quick drag on her cigarette, says hi and makes her way to the gym door

Brain: What the fuck?

Me: I know, that’s kind of weird

Brain: Dude she’s smoking a cigarette as she is walking into the gym

Me: I guess it’s good she’s going to the gym

Brain: I guess.

Me: That’s fucked up

Brain: Not as fucked up as you think.

Me: What do you mean.

Brain: Back in the day it was common to see cigarette smoking and athletic endeavors

Me: Like

Brain: I was reading an excerpt from “Lost On Everest” the story behind the push up the west ridge of Everest.

Me: So

Brain: I think it was in 1963 and the biggest sponsors were: National Geographic, Rainier Beer and the American Tobacco Company

Me: Interesting

Brain: I love the quote, “the smokers were horrified to discover that, instead of the expected 60,000 cigarettes, there were only 6,000; and everyone knows you can’t climb a mountain on that little nicotine.”

Me: LOL, no fucking way.

Brain: Go figure. Maybe the gym is 5am woman’s Everest

Me: Could be

Brain: Indeed


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