Brain: Peepers peeping, the Bard owls hooting, a foggy, dank spring morning
Me: Zzzzzzzzzz
Brain: Ah, Spring. All is well for the moment
Me: Zzzzzzzzz
Brain: He’s going to be so grumpy when he wakes up
Me: Zzzzzzzzz
Brain: Okay, it’s 4:03am, cue the alarm for one minute
Me: Zzzzzzzzz
Alarm goes off
Brain: Come on sleepy head, wake up
Me: Zzzzzzzzz
Brain: WAKE UP
Me: Zzzzzzzzz
Brain: Don’t make me do it
Me: Zzzzzzzzz
Brain: WAKE UP
Me: Zzzzzz, yawn
Somehow turns off alarm in sleep
Brain: Hey wake up
Me: Zzzzzzzzzzz
Brain: Shit, this is an emergency. He shut off the alarm. We could oversleep
Me: Zzzzzzzzzz
Brain: Okay, we’re going into code snooze mode
Me: Zzzzzzzzz
Brain: Okay, let me look into the code snooze tool shed
Me: Zzzzzzzzz
Brain: Hmmmmm, something to make him wake up instantly
Me: Zzzzzzzzz
Brain: Tornado? No. Shark attack? No. Paris Hilton? No. Squiggly things? No.
Me: Zzzzzzzzz
Brain: Hmmmmm, Falling? Too late in the morning. Something related to Spring? Exactly
Me: Zzzzzzzzz
Brain: Hope this works
Me: ACK!!!! WHAT THE FUCK! WHERE DID IT GO?
Brain: What? What?
Me: The tick. There was a tick crawling on my face. I felt it
Brain: Really?
Me: Yes it was on my eyelid. Where did it fucking go?
Brain: Hmmmm, I don’t know
Me: Watch out I need to get the fuck outta bed. NOW
Brain: Okay. Wow good thing you woke up it’s almost ten after four.
Me: Shit, I must have turned off the alarm
Brain: Yep, you must have.
Me: Where the fuck did that tick go
Brain: I wouldn’t worry about it. It’s probably just a dream
Me: No way, I really felt it.
Brain: Sure you did
Me: You didn’t do that, did you?
Brain: Me? What?
Me: You made me dream that a tick was crawling across my eyelid, didn’t you?
Brain: Ummmmm, maybe
Me: Why would you do that? You suck
Brain: Rise and shine sleepy head
Me: You are such a dick
Brain: I got us up, didn’t I?
Me: Whatever, leave me alone
Brain: Let’s go sweat Fat Man
Me: Fine