Squish, Squash, Squoosh

Brain: So you might have noticed we took a little siesta

Me: Little?

Brain: In the grand scheme of the space-time continuum it was a simple siesta. A brief break, a relaxing rewind, a restful respite, a collective chill out.

Me: I get it

Brain: Well you were no help Mr. let’s sequester ourselves for a week in the woods of Vermont with limited access to the interwebs

Me: Hey you enjoyed that as much as me

Brain: That is true. Except for that morning when we were laying in our sleeping bag and we looked up and saw a spider slowly descending on a thread of web about a foot above our face

Me: I had tried to forget that. Poor spider, he didn’t stand a chance

Heart: I know. Did you have to squish it?

Brain: I had no choice. It was destined to be squished

Me: Yep, no choice

Heart: We could have caught it and let it go

Brain: No way Jose. It was a foot above our face and descending, we had to act.

Heart: Poor squished spider

Me: There are just some things that have to be squished

Heart: Oh yeah, like what

Me: Like bugs

Brain: Squish, squash, squoosh

Me: What?

Brain: Just thinking out loud

Heart: Thinking about what?

Brain: I’m thinking of the difference between the three: squish, squash, squoosh

Me: Hmmmm, good question

Heart: Well I don’t like any of them

Brain: I read that you can look at squish as what happens when you have two moveable planes converging on an object. Like when you squish a mosquito between your hands. Or like in Animal House, when John Belushi squishes mashed potatoes in his mouth between his cheeks.  I think squish is the most delicate of the three even though the results of the three are similar

Me: Interesting, I think I agree

Heart: I loved that movie

Brain: What?

Heart: I loved Animal House

Brain: Jeez, thanks Heart

Me: So if squish is the most delicate would squash be the lease delicate? Squash as the action that requires the most force?

Brain: I think of squash as bringing our foot down on something…. a moveable object impacting a stationary surface.

Me: I don’t know. What would you call something that gets run over with an automobile tire?

Brain: Dead

Heart: Very funny

Me: No really Brain. In the scenario above, a moveable object (tire) runs over something on a stationary surface (road bed)

Brain: Given our discussion that scenario would describe something getting squashed not squished

Heart: This is all disgusting

Me: So where does squoosh come in?

Brain: I think squoosh is just a different form of squash

Me: I guess

Heart: Can we talk about something more happy?

Brain: Sure Heart, anything to make you happy

Me: Indeed


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