Reflective Brain

Me: Hey Brain Brain: What? Me: I deleted all the German names from my cell phone Brain: What? Me: Yeah, it’s Hans-free Brain: It’s a wonder that I hang around with you. Me: Not like you have a choice Brain: True Me: Hey what’s the difference between a Hippo and a Zippo? Brain: Stop Me: … More Reflective Brain

Twitter Brain

Me:  <In a panic> Holy shit, we have a big problem Brain: Huh? Me: We have a big problem, wake the fuck up Brain: What’s the problem? Me: I forgot my password Brain: Which password? Me: I don’t know, I think all of them Brain: What are you talking about? Me: My phone doesn’t recognize … More Twitter Brain

Beetle Brain

Me: What the fuck was all that about? Brain: Huh? Me: Seriously, what was with all the beetles? Brain: Huh? Beatles? Me: Yes, I could hardly sleep because I kept dreaming about Beetles Brain: Which one? Me: What do you mean which one? Brain: Well, there was John, George, Paul and Ringo Me: No, not … More Beetle Brain

Foggy Brain

Brain: Man, I can’t see anything through this fog Me: Yawn, what? Brain: I can’t see shit through this fog. What the hell did you do? Me: Nothing Brain: No really, what did you do? Me: About what? Brain: What do you mean, about what? Me You asked me what did I do and all … More Foggy Brain

Fathoms of the Brain

Me: Breathe in, breathe out Brain: Yawn Me: Breathe in, breathe out, no sleeping, relax Brain: Yawn Me: Breathe in, breathe out, focus Brain: hmmmmmmm, focus Me: Breathe in, breathe out, singular focus, breathe in, breathe out Brain: hmmmmmmm, singular focus Me: That’s it Brain – breathe in, breathe out – we’re almost there Brain: … More Fathoms of the Brain


Brain:  What the fuck happened to yesterday and why is tomorrow so pissed off at today? Me:  I don’t know Brain: I think yesterday is pissed because yesterday knows it’s all but forgotten.  What really pisses off tomorrow is that it may never happen and if it does happen it’s today and tomorrow is still … More Fleeting

REM Brain

< Bolting upright in bed in a total adrenaline rush> Me: What the fuck! Holy shit! Man, that was close Brain: What’s up Fat Man Me: What’s up? Didn’t you hear that thunder? Brain: What are you talking about? Me: We almost got hit by lightning Brain: Really? Me: What?  We really almost just got … More REM Brain